the road most traveled

So I'm convinced that when I take cold medicine, it slides through my mouth, past the tonsils that once were, down my esophagus, at which point it hits a fork in the road. One sign reads, "The Road to Wellness," the other, "The Road to Nowhere." The medicine then takes the road most traveled, to nowhere, and begins dispersing itself amongst my fingernails and other body parts and functions that could care less about clear nasal passages.

I try to pretend that when I look in the mirror my eyeball doesn't slide down to my lips, but let's be honest - Picasso face is back. And it has successfully captured my REM cycles not to mention the smudgy parts of my face.

SERIOUSLY?!