arrival

​This little mister came earlier than planned (thank the heavens). I had developed cholestasis. (Cholestasis is a pregnancy induced liver problem that sends bile into the blood instead of the intestines and makes the body a dangerous place for the baby and a miserable place for the mother.) Before I knew it, we were at the hospital. And there I was again - hooked up to tubes and monitors, being pumped with pitocin and all sorts of magic (bloat inducing garbage) in an effort to get this little man to come out (I've been induced for all three births, three different reasons).

It took hours upon hours before my body would let this baby go (I went in at noon and had him at 2:30 a.m.), and when it was time to push I had barely the energy to muster, but then there he was. The doctor held him up, and because Jess lets me have the first look, I yelped "Hon, you got your boy!" 

There he was safe and screaming and beautiful. All I remember is holding his face next to mine and saying over and over, "We made it baby. We made it." Those last weeks were long and hard, with unexplained medical problems and giant sized worries. Not to mention physical misery on my part. I had never wanted a baby to come more than I wanted this one. I wanted this baby out and safe. And finally - there he was.

And my goodness he's wonderful. His spirit in our home is magic. He exudes love and happiness and peace, and he is really everything we've needed for so long. Worth the wait a hundred times over.

I've always been incredibly nervous to have a baby boy. I only know the girl thing. But now he's here, and it's like he always has been. And he has stolen my heart entirely. He's welcome to keep it. 

So grateful he's here and that he's ours. 

That's a giant bruise on his head. :(
He was huge and got man handled on the way out.
Kind of breaks our hearts.