don't grow up

So I just finished watching Gilmore Girls (seasons 1-7). I've watched several seasons of the Girls several times. And I've mentioned this before - I love the Gilmore Girls. I've been called Lorelai (the mom) by some, and I consider the girls my pseudo friends. I love their wit, their friendship, their lives. While I've watched some seasons multiple times, this was only my second time watching the sixth and seventh seasons. The first time through, I just didn't like how it ended much. I wanted something different for them. This time, it was much better.

In the last few episodes of the show (and this doesn't give anything away for any of you who haven't made it through and think you might someday), Rory (the daughter) graduates from college and gets a job as a reporter. And as I watched those last minutes of my favorite friends, watched them say goodbye to each other as she embarked on one of the biggest steps we all take - the step away from mommy - I cried. Granted, I have a truckload of pregnancy hormones barreling through my veins, which doesn't help my tear ducts in their efforts to seal, but I cried.

Suddenly I very much wanted my baby to stay little, stay my baby. Recently I've been wishing I could speed up this pregnancy process. I mean, really. It feels like forever to someone who counts patience as a virtue she could simply do without. But as I watched the Girls say goodbye, I suddenly decided that Baby could take his or her time.

Be tiny. Don't grow up. If you do, then we have to say goodbye.

Because if I have anything to do with it, I'll have the kind of relationship with my babies that will leave me hopelessly sobbing as I drive away, leaving them at their first apartment, with their first roommates, for their very first time without me.

So for now, stay small little one. Make yourself comfortable. And promise you'll never ever grow up.