Tuesday, May 3, 2011

eye see you

So when I went to my 25 week check up, I mentioned to my doctor that although I sounded crazy, I was pretty sure my eyelashes were falling out. And perhaps a normal person wouldn't notice such a thing, but for someone who's rather vain about her eyelashes, it's a thing. My OB took a gander at my eyes, then told me to call the endocrinologist (thyroid doc) because it wasn't pregnancy, but it could be my thyroid. And I was all, "Oh, you mean that blasted defunct organ that I blame most of life's problems on? Okay, sure."

So then I called Nurse Wendy (we talk at least once a month) who told me to have my blood drawn, even though I'd just had some sucked out of me two weeks before and things looked good (with a minor hormone adjustment). So I got my blood drawn. After she got the results and the doctor reviewed them, she called me and said there was no way it was my thyroid, but was I picking at my eyes? I was indignant. Picking at my eyes? What, am I two?

And then that night as I rolled around in my non-sleep, I realized that indeed, I WAS PICKING AT MY EYES. For real. As I flailed my pregnant body around, desperate to find sleep, I was tugging off the mascara that I never wash off before bed (it's waterproof), and I WAS PLUCKING MY VANITY OUT, eyelash by eyelash.

So yes, I'm two.

I was remotely (read: totally) embarrassed and went to the store the very next day and bought industrial strength makeup remover. That way, even if my fingers do become temporarily possessed and want to claw at something while I'm half asleep, at least there's nothing to extract from my eyes. Maybe I could subconsciously start pulling out the gray hair on my head. Now that would be a useful, while-you-weren't-sleeping activity.

The good news? My eyelashes are growing back. My vanity is slowly being restored.

NOTE: Photo is from many moons ago. When I had eyelashes. And bangs. The good ol' days.

1 comment:

eclaires said...

I tried the whole pulling out my gray hairs... don't do it. Your hair will begin to feel significantly thinner. :)

Kind of like those eyebrows.


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