bed what?

Two words: Bed. Rest.

Seriously?

My blood pressure is looking awesome, prompting the doc to put me on "bed rest." What is bed rest really? I've been a complete lazy butt for weeks now, due to back and pelvic pain that just makes me cranky enough to stop moving. How much more lazy can I possibly get? Do I have to lay out at the pool for a few more hours? Take another nap? I suppose I'll have to eliminate grocery shopping, my one recreational activity.

Don't worry - they hooked up the little one to a fetal monitor to have a listen. And then they'd come by to listen and just giggle. As it turns out, this baby was bound and determined to kick the monitor off my belly. Its movement was more than sufficient (if not excessive), heart rate was great, and it even showed off its hiccups (a good sign, it shows the baby's lungs and breathing instincts are healthy). Everything looks great, except my blood pressure.

You know how I've been wanting Baby to be early? Turns out there's a pretty good chance.

Excuse me while I go "rest."

all wrapped up

Ever since I can remember, my mom has been crocheting baby blankets. Sometimes they're the simple edged blankets, but often they're the real deal. I can recall dozens of blankets flying out of her fingers, and there are just as many babies who've been wrapped up in her creations. Through the years, she developed a system: one pattern for baby boys, one for girls. And I would watch those blankets twist into life and yearn deep inside for one of my own, for a blanket for my baby. I loved the soft yarn she chose specifically because it would be soft on a baby's brand new skin. I loved the patterns she chose and the precision with which each pattern came to life. I knew that someday...someday...my baby would be wrapped up in my mom's love.

When she came to visit a few weeks ago, she brought me my blankets - one boy pattern, one girl pattern, both white, both exquisite in their simple beauty. After she left, I buried my face in them. They smell like her, like home, and I know her hands so very lovingly created them. When I showed Jess the blankets, I couldn't quite find the words I was looking for to express how he needed to "Look! Look at these!"

For years I've watched these blankets stack up, and for years I've known that someday my baby would come home in one too. There is something unbelievably comfortable about knowing my baby will come home wrapped up in her love, a place I've returned to over and over again.

NOTE: If it's a boy, it will be the "basket weave" pattern on the left. For a girl, the "scalloped" pattern on the right.

opinionated already

So our baby is (already) quite particular and very choosy. For months, Little Cheney has been kicking for Mommy almost always, for others, almost never. Including Daddy. If you really want to feel the baby, you have to wait for its daily bout (or two) of hiccups when my stomach suddenly begins to bounce in rhythmic jolts. Other than that, it takes a lot of patience and a lot more luck.

However, in the last month, it seems that Baby has accepted his or her father and will now kick when Jess' hand is on my stomach. One night, or rather early morning, when I crawled into bed after being up all night with one of my pregnancy ailments (I forget which, probably my ever rotting gums), Jess rolled over and put his arm around my stomach. I promptly fell asleep, and my pregnancy snoring ensued. Jess reports that the baby nudged his arm off and on for a while. But when I let out a particularly man-sized snort, the baby pummeled my innards. This prompted me to sort of stir and stop snoring for a moment. I then fell back into my REM cycle and soon resumed my snoring. However, when the snoring again reached a decibel level that was unacceptable to Baby, he or she would unleash another barrage of punches and kicks until I stirred and the snoring settled again.

I think it's kind of embarrassing. I snore so loud my unborn child finds it annoying.

Awesome.

what a hoot

A few weekends ago, Jess had the chance to go to Jackson Hole on a mini retreat with the law firm he's working with this summer. My doctor let me know that she'd rather not have me birthing in the forest, so I got to stay home. (However, my sisters and mom came to visit, which was much preferred to watching people do fun things while I sat pregnant.) And of course, Jess packed his baby with him. It was pretty yucky weather, but he still managed to snag some fun wildlife photos.

I'm so excited to do normal people things again. Hike, bike, (wait, I don't bike), run, um, walk at a moderate pace, so I love these photos, small reminders that someday I will.

Also, I want to squeeze and hug that owl. Looks like a cuddly stuffed animal.

I need a baby. Seriously.

here's looking at you kid

So it's one thing to see the profile ultrasound pic of the baby (note the ever big lips - love, love them):

But it's an entirely different experience to be lying there, adoring those lips, when all of the sudden the face turns. And looks at me. And I know to you this looks more like an alien than a baby...

...but I'm in love already.

No, we STILL don't know the gender.

permanently pregnant

So I'm told pregnancy is not a permanent condition. I'll believe it when I see it. ("It" being Baby Cheney.) Because I feel as though this may go on forever. And for the record, I don't think my stomach can fit much more growth. The poor thing must be so uncomfortable in there. Every squirm from the babe elicits a shift of discomfort on my part. It's like we play tug of war with the space left in there. I rarely win.

In any case, I thought maybe I should look for the silver lining of the last four weeks instead of talking about how my body is otherwise falling apart. Here are a few of the things that are keeping me smiling these days.

1. Johnson's Bedtime Lotion and Bath

Have you smelled this? So I Iove the regular old pink stuff, and I have some of that too, given that it is a requisite purchase in that the smell of a baby is contained therein. However, this? Um, I want to pour it all over myself. It smells so delightful. I kind of want to eat it.

So sometimes when you're pregnant, you want to eat things that aren't food. Just for the record.

2. My jeans

Just wanted to say that although the baby has now dropped as far as it can possibly drop - sometimes I feel as though it would be most appropriate to pick my stomach up before I stand - I'm still wearing the one pair of jeans I bought for pregnancy. WITHOUT ANY RUBBER BAND TRICKS. Thanks to today's low rise trends, they still button just below my belly. And by the way, I am down to that ONE PAIR of pants. Seriously. No intention of buying more either. It's skirts and the one pair of pants from here on out my friends. Pajama pants if it gets desperate.

3. HGTV

So as you recall, I can't nest. Not appropriately anyway. But I've found a really good solution - HGTV. I watch other people nest. All. Day. Long. It's kind of an addiction. Okay, it's possible that I dream in re-design. Paint swatches. Floor options. And then my dear friend pointed me in the direction of this blog, and well, it is now part of my daily blog consumption. I seriously ache to paint a wall.

So while it's possible that I feel nigh unto losing my mind, I do see an end in sight. And I imagine that end will include late night feedings. And HGTV. :)

on nesting

So what happens when you are in the thirty sixth week of pregnancy and you're desperate to "nest," but you've pretty much eliminated your options for nesting. Keeping the gender a secret was fun for a while, but now I'm like HOLY CRAP I NEED TO SHOP. And I can't. And then there's the fact that we're not really at home so it's not like I can prepare the nursery. That is if I believed in nurseries.

That's right - I don't get the concept. For one thing - children do this thing called GROW. Which means that eventually they will not actually love the little choo choo trains on their walls, say when they take up a particular affinity for football. Or band. Plus, it's likely that this first child will share a room with the next, or the next will inherit the room. And then what? I have to rip down the trains and put up ballerinas? Um, no thanks. I'm actually the biggest fan of decorating, especially painting. One of the best sounds in the world is the roll of a properly saturated paint roller. Yum. But if it happened that I actually had an extra room to make into a nursery (we don't - Baby will be sharing space with the weight bench and the stationary bike), I'd probably go pretty neutral.

But I digress.

So I'm dying to nest and pretty much can't. So what do I do? Decorate the......blog. Sure, I could've waited to do this when Baby is here and it makes a little more sense, but since when do pregnant women do anything that makes sense? Plus, I hear that with the arrival of our little wailer, suddenly my "schedule" is going to be turned on its head, so blog redesign might not happen later.

So for those of you who are somewhat appalled by my feelings toward nurseries, pretend that my blog is a nursery. See? I really do care.

with this ring

So as it turns out, my blood pressure is looking a little on the high side. Now some of you may stress out at news like that. I, on the other hand, think to myself, "So there's a chance I get to be induced...EARLY? If you insist..."

So the doc sent me to get some blood work done to check and see if this high blood pressure is anything more than the simple desire to go into labor two weeks early. While the cute little gal was extracting my blood, she glanced at my left hand and said, "Your ring is gorgeous!"

I was tempted to simply thank her and pretend that I really did carry around a dozen carats on one finger. Instead, I told her to go to Wal Mart, where she too could get a wedding ring this beautiful for the cost saving value of $10.

My sisters in law took pity on my swelling fingers (I grew out of my wedding ring months ago) and snagged this for me. My father in law told Jess it makes an excellent template for something like a ten year anniversary gift.

I couldn't agree more.

slacker

So I've really become a slacker on the blogging front. The problem is, I only have a few things to say:

1. I'm really large. I mean seriously.
2. I'm huge. I mean seriously.

I walked into our bedroom at our apartment (which features very low ceilings) and Jess said, "You are a large woman." I feigned offense, but if we're being honest, my stomach enters a room long before I do. And the little tiny door frames do not mask the appearance of my hugeness.

I think the other problem is that when I'm not working, I'm either laying out by the pool (hard life, yes) or sleeping, thereby eliminating my blogging time. I can't nap enough. It's like the first trimester all over again, minus the pukes and the desire to eliminate food from my diet. I'm not sleeping well at night both because I have to visit the Ladies like 500 times (Jess used to be a light sleeper - he has since developed an amazing ability to sleep right through all my night time treks) and because I have recurring (read: chronic) gum pain. The good news is I think I might have figured out the issue - I have a massive sinus infection that takes root in my gums due to their already sensitive nature. The doc has me on an antibiotic, and that seems to be helping.

But in the middle of the night, I'm never alone either. It's nice to have my little friend kicking and rolling around while I'm sitting up (to keep the sinuses in my head from exploding), not sleeping. It makes me all too excited for when the baby is out, and we're not sleeping.

Seriously. I know it's not the same, but at this point I'd much rather be up with a hungry baby than trudging to the toilet for the tenth time in two hours. I've had a chat with Baby Cheney and we've decided that a few weeks early is the target.

SERIOUSLY.

weighing in

So is it a bad thing when you step on the scales at your 34 week appointment, and the nurse says:

"OH GOOD. You lost a pound."

I think I should've probably adopted this little-to-no-exercise physical fitness program much earlier in pregnancy.

And please pass the doughnut holes.