the weather outside

So fall in our little corner of the world has been SPECTACULAR. I've hesitated to mention it because I don't want to jinx it - it seriously feels surreal. It's November 11, and still...no snow. I love snow. I do. But it makes life a little more tricky, especially where we live (at the top of a steep driveway that sits at the top of a steep cul de sac THAT NEVER GETS PLOWED). So this beautiful weather has been basically the best. These photos are from Jess' cousin's wedding. The most perfect weather for a beautiful day.

Annabelle's camera smiles crack me up...

And also Lou's...haha.

Annabelle caught the bouquet!
(After all the eligible ladies dodged it and let it drop
and Belle picked it up off the floor with a cheer! :) )

This post would not be complete without a grainy selfie
taken in a super fancy bathroom with the aunties. :)

our everything

If you're close to us, you know this; if you're not, you can probably guess. We've been ready and willing to have another baby for a few years now. I've spoken in veiled terms about the past few years, but it's been a rough go. Things just didn't go the way we planned in so many ways. But we've learned so much about a bigger plan; we practiced patience. Heaven knows I'm just about as impatient as they come, so I can use all the practice I can get.

In many ways, not being pregnant during those rough months was a blessing because pregnancy is not easy for me. No not one bit. But I've never stopped wishing and hoping and praying that we might get one more miracle. My thyroid disease makes things tricky. Indeed, it places our Annabelle and Lydia Lou in the miracle category.

In my heart, I don't feel like we're done. I feel like another baby will come our way someday. But as I thought about this the other day - as I often do - I realized this: if this is the family that Heavenly Father wants us to have, I couldn't ask for anything more. These two babies - these sisters that were no doubt angelic best friends - were meant to be here together. They are incredibly amazing babies with kind and wise souls that came quick and just when we needed them. They are everything to us; and they are everything we could've ever dreamed of. 

And then there's this - they are everything to each other. These two girls could not be more different from one another than they are. Where Annabelle is calm and collected, Lou is wild and unpredictable. Where Lou is the epitome of happiness and there isn't a thing in the world that will get her down, Annabelle is deeply sensitive and tender and feels the sorrows of the world in the deepest parts of her soul. Where Annabelle is cautious and observant, Lou is unabashedly brave and confident. They are the kind of opposites that provide almost exact balance for one another. They are the best kind of sisters - they rely on each other, buoy each other up. They drive each other crazy one second but then I'll hear them quietly apologizing and hugging it out the next. They live in the same imaginary world, yet each of them give the other space for their way of interpreting things. They respect each other. They love each other. They protect each other. And together, they can accomplish anything. I suspect the two of them will be conquering the world together always.

I'm not done hoping. But if these are the babies allotted to us, I offer up all the gratitude in my heart for two such as these. For two girls who are their own little jigsaw puzzle, their pieces fitting just right. For babies who fill us with joy and love until we burst. I couldn't ask for more.

scenes from a halloween

Halloween. It's now a real thing because I have kids old enough to realize they can dress up and oh the possibilities and can I wear my costume now forever today tonight can I sleep in it. 

The bun hair do - which is most close to Periwinkle's - hurt her head.
So she went with pretty curls for the other outings.

They each chose their costumes months ago - and miraculously, they each stuck with their idea. Annabelle insisted on being Periwinkle, Tinker Bell's sister. I started looking for this costume about four months ago. I found it online once - but in a too tiny size. And then I could find super fancy homemade ones if I was prepared to mortgage my house to pay for it. And I could find about forty billion Tinker Bell costume varieties. But no Periwinkle. One day my sister-in-law sent me a link with an I FOUND IT! Miracle! It was in the UK, sold through ebay, and I clicked BUY IT NOW immediately.  

We've had these small swords for a while now.
Lou has them hidden - literally - and when Jess starts wrestling,
she'll disappear and come running out screaming,
sword in hand. It's kind of awesome.

Lou is not just a viking. She's Hiccup. From the movie, How to Train Your Dragon. She's not Astrid, the female lead. She's Hiccup, the male lead. And she instructed me months ago that I was to be Toothless (his dragon). Her costume was an Amazon.com find, and I did indeed track down a cheap little Toothless Beanie to play her pet dragon. And Target's dollar spot provided an excellent sword and shield. 

This little group of kindergarteners is pretty fabulous.
So grateful she got such a fun class and the most perfect teacher.

For a holiday that I put very little importance on (what are we celebrating really?) and try to downplay as much as I can, we managed to get some serious mileage out of those costumes. These photos are from multiple Halloween outings, including the ward trunk or treat, visits (plural - both in costume) at Gram's, the kindergarten Halloween party (I'm the room parent = pipe cleaner crafts galore!), Halloween at the Zoo, and regular ol' trick or treating.

I really think Halloween is a dumb day. But I can't get enough of these babies. They were so proud and happy and full of sugar. FULL OF SUGAR. So happy they were so happy. 

Click here to see this same scene, two years ago. It's magic.

I don't even...

And the best part of Halloween? It signifies the beginning of the best holiday season of all. Let the twinkle lights twinkle. It's game time folks.

Halloween 2012

Halloween 2011

Halloween 2010

Halloween 2009

random

+ One morning a week or so ago, I decided I'd do a quick 20 minutes of some bodyweight cardio. I've been using FitnessBlender's workouts religiously for quite some time now (and I LOVE them), so I just thought, "Eh, I'll skip the warm up. I'm good." Little did I know. Ten minutes later, my back seized up and I spent the next two days wearing a heat pack, doping up on ibuprofen, and hobbling around like a little old lady. Lesson: I am old and can no longer just "skip" the warm up. 

+ When in St. George, go to Swig, and get a Dirty Dr Pepper (Diet is my jam). Ignore everything they say about sugar and aspartame and death. Dirty DP = worth the risk. Thirty two ounces of risk. Worth it.

+ Remember our little preschooler? Wellllll....she dropped out. She started fuhreaking out every time I dropped her off. And listen - I'm selfish and didn't even want her to go in the first place. So we debated it and decided to just call it good for now and start three days a week next year. She still goes to (and lovessssss) tumbling, and her preschool teacher was super sweet about it and is excited to have her next year.

+ Speaking of tumbling - Annabelle did her first real (unassisted) back walk over while in St. George. I know this means little to most of us, but it's a BIG DEAL. It requires a truckload of bravery plus cannonball shoulders and a core of steel. I'm so excited for her. At tumbling class last week, with the security of the cushy mat below her, she did it over and over and over. Soooo proud. Mommy buttons busting.

+ I don't have my Christmas shopping done. I mention this because usually I do by this point. I have issues. But fall starts and my brain turns to glitter and sparkles and all I can think about is Christmas. I seriously pulled out Michael Buble's Christmas album like ten years ago. Go listen to this. You'll be Christmas shopping in no time. Oh, if you're Christmas card shopping, I've got my stock up in the shop. Click on over here and go crazy. :)

+ Here's a pumpkin cookie recipe for your fall needs. You NEED this recipe. Also, why do we only eat pumpkin stuff in the fall? I'm hereby starting a movement to eat pumpkin cookies year round.

+ Papa Murphy's now has gluten free pizza. Three cheers for elastic waistbands!

+ All you mommies, this article on being brave and somehow accepting that your babies have to grow up in a scary world. Just. I love it.

+ We got Jess a fish for his birthday. It's red, which is important when I tell you the next detail, but only if you are as awesome as us will that detail make sense. His name is Jean-Luc Picard. I know. It is hard to describe how much I pride myself on the nerdiness that pervades in our home. And it's some kind of cute when the girls run to his tank at night and shout a "Good night Captain!" 

fallish

Oh fall. Stick around as long as you want.

prom night

Jess recently started working at a new job. (Fireworks, pom poms!, cartwheels!!!!) He's still a lawyer, but he went in house for a solar power company. It's been life changing in so many ways.

Including this.

Note: He's hiding a box of Junior Mints in his clenched fist there.
I do enjoy that it makes him look super stressed, however.

For the first time in many years, Jess and I got dressed up - I mean dressed up - and we went to the ball. Jess' company was a sponsor of the Governor's Gala this year, and as such, they were invited. He text messaged me one day with a, "Do we want to go to the Governor's Ball?" Me: "Yes. No idea what it is. But yes we do."

The last time I put on a fancy dress and actually focused on achieving the perfect liquid line occurred seven years ago when we got married. (Danielle? Rissa? That reference was for you.) I gave myself a whole hour to get ready for this shin dig. A whole hour. Not a lash was left uncurled. So naturally I took selfies and sent them to my sister in Houston with whom I'd been sharing all my shopping anxieties regarding finding an appropriate ensemble.

This outfit brought to you by (Target's brand of) Spanx. Thank you and Amen.

When my beloved Target didn't turn up anything appropriate for such an event, I went to the mall. It was as painful as I anticipated. I left the mall with nothing but bad anxiety and a case of hives. Thankfully, my sister-in-law Whitney has a fabulous closet, and my shopping experience there went much better. I also went shopping in Grandma Cheney's jewelry. Basically I married into really great clothes and accessories.

The Gala's theme was "On Broadway," and it was simply lovely. Hale Centre Theatre (a local community theater - and apparently the largest community theater in the country) spearheaded the deal, featuring powerhouse voices singing the familiar theme songs from seven musicals, including Wicked, Annie, and Les Mis (tears). 

Basically, I think I should go to the prom at least once a month. It seriously was exactly what we needed and the perfect reminder that things are changing. Jess tried to pass it off as an anniversary date (our official seven year mark was the day before), but not so. His lazy butt was duly noted. 

It's so hard for me to believe that things can be different than the way they've been for a few years now, that our normal can shift back to what we've been praying and hoping for. I loved having this night to remember it.

And also. To take selfies.

And to eat salad in a cucumber bowl. 

Life is good. So good.

fallllllllll

On Monday night, we piled into the car (and I literally mean that - my RAV died over a month ago so we were literally piled into Jess' little Civic) with the goal of going...somewhere. These were the options that Jess and I had pre-determined:

1. Ross to shop for winter coats.

2. Papa's house.

3. Sam's Club for churros.

4. Temple Quarry Trail walk.

We asked Annabelle to pick a number. She chose four. So there we were. Smack dab in the middle of fall. And I would now like to apologize for hating on the smart phones. Because dude. I had a camera. And no, they're not as sharp as if I was hauling the SLR. But they're photos. And they have fall.

Fall is my favorite of all the seasons. This has been well documented. But this fall especially. This fall is shaping up to be full of everything amazing. It feels super surreal around here, the way the tide is shifting. But Imma roll with it. Because it's all pretty dang awesome.

Happy fall y'all.